Open Letter To Katlego Danke’s Weave...

I've heard some of my mates complain about "Dineo's" weave and I really wanted to let Durban know that you are not the only ones that are worried.

Reblogged from Just Curious
Source: http://www.justcurious.co.za/2012/02/open-letter-to-katlego-dankes-weave/

Written in February 29, 2012 by Zamani Khethelo  

 

Dear Katlego Danke’s weave.

For me to sit down and actually write this letter to you, its either I’m bored and have no life at all, or am traumatized beyond belief. I would like to believe it’s the latter.

First things I would like to know;

• “What are you?”
• What is your ambition in life?
• Do you have goals?
• Is there anything you want to achieve in life?

Your situation is currently not “relaxed” at all.

Your bonding is certainly not making anyone bond with you right now, even that lady whose head you are laying on is not bonding with you because you have managed to make her look like Abigail Kubheka and Thandie Klassen’s peer. Actually those two legends look younger than Miss Danke at this current point in time.

What you are doing should be made illegal, as you are not only torturing that beautiful lady’s face, but you are also torturing a whole nation every day of the week at 8pm.

For a whole year you looked like a helmet and everyone got used to you and forgave you, but now you have taken it too far.

You have more highlights than an episode of “Soccer Zone”. I have seen a brewing pot of Chakalaka that has more order and better synchronization than you. What you are doing is called abuse, The other day I had to call POWA.

I told the lady from POWA; “Madame! Madame! there’s a woman on my screen who is getting beat up by her weave everyday an, and no one is doing anything to help her. “  They said they’d look further into the matter.

I felt that was not enough; I then called the SPCA and told the man who answered the phone; “Sir! Sir! There’s this beautiful lady who’s walking around with this animal on her head, I think it’s an endangered specie that everyone thought that had gotten extinct during the “Ice Age”.

They also said they’ll look into the matter.

The struggle that is happening on Kay-Dee’s head is really unjust, Hector Pieterson and the youth of the Apartheid era did not die for “The Struggle” to continue on Katli’s head, and I’m afraid their spirits might just rise and go riot outside the Generations studios, so therefore this situation should be declared a state of emergency.

I honestly refuse to believe that you are South African and therefore will also call Home Affairs to check whether you are legally here in the country, because we already know that you are situated illegally on Katli’s head.

At least when you were shaped like a helmet, we all took a comfort in knowing that if Kay-Dee ever decided to be a biker chick, she would always be safe and protected, but now you are un-safe for all.
I hear that last week one blind lady miraculously got her vision back but unfortunately her eyes opened up while watching Generations and the first thing she saw was you, reclining unfortunately on Katli’s head. The poor woman asked to be blind again, with immediate effect.

Enough is Enough! If this situation is not sorted out as soon as possible, I will have no choice but to ask Mercy Phakela to perform a one night only extravaganza to raise funds for you to get a nicely laid Lace-front wig.
In the meantime I have asked my people to negotiate with Bonang Matheba to donate  some of her “Diva Devine” left-overs.

Oh dear weave you have really hurt my feelings more than you have hurt Katli’s face.

I know that she gave up good hair for lent, but her lent has been going on for over two years now, I’m sure even the lawd will agree with me; Its time to move on to good hair.

I will pray for you more than I pray for myself.

Sincerely yours.
Concerned Citizen Zamani Khethelo